This past January, I embarked on the exciting experience of filling out my third self evaluation as a proud employee of Anonymous Agency. In the interest of full disclosure, I actually got it done on January 31st. I can’t help it. Normally I have everything done early, weeks before the due date, so I can review and edit, because I’m a giant loser. I struggle, really struggle, with self evaluations, though. My supervisor wants to know why I have such a hard time giving myself credit. I attribute it to Catholic guilt.
Not to mention, I feel like I’m not saying anything substantial. It’s all about trying to make yourself look as good as possible, in order to
secure a raise not get fired. Would anyone looking at my evaluation really get to know the real SocialJerk, as a social worker?
I’ve talked about honest progress notes, how about honest evaluations?
- Sarcasm. Perhaps I should list that as “humor” but it’s important.
- Writing. Not just snarky blog posts. I’ve seen the notes some other people hand in. You supervisors should be happy to have me. Allow me to demonstrate. “You’re standing over there, holding your dog. They’re standing over here, holding their dogs.” See what happened?
- Not throttling teenagers.
- Politely not running out of houses when animals relieve themselves in the living room, or it’s made known that there are bed bugs present.
- Righteous indignation/rage. It keeps me going.
- Baking. Are these all supposed to be work related?
Areas for development:
One, I love your phrasing. “Areas for development” is so much better than “stuff you suck at.” Now let’s see, stuff I suck at.
- I need to stop feeling personally responsible when a family gets evicted, a child gets shot, or a kid skips school. I’m not omnipotent or omniscient, so I need to get the hell over it.
- I buy candy at the bodega way too much. They know me and it’s getting embarrassing.
- Maybe I don’t have to do all the work by myself. Or something.
- Excessive tweeting at work.
- I could work on my game face. Actually, I need to develop a game face. Apparently I’m quite expressive. Meaning, when I think someone is full of shit, it’s clear. In a field in which people are often full of shit, this isn’t always an asset.
- Even if I think another worker is an idiot, I need to be able to work with him or her.
- I make fun of my boss on the internet. This might not be productive.
- Making excuses for people’s bullshit is not doing them any favors, it just enables their shitty behavior.
- Not everyone has to like me.
- Leaving on time is not leaving early. I say this but I don’t know it.
- Similarly, getting in on time is not getting in late.
Goals for professional growth:
- Get my LCSW. I know I’m within a few hundred hours of my needed two thousand, but counting them up is time consuming and scary and I don’t wanna. But I will. Also I have a love/hate relationship with standardized tests. I’m a good student, I LOVE being graded. However, part of why I’m a good student is that I freak myself out and convince myself I’m going to fail if I don’t study.
- Stop rambling.
Of course, we’re not done. I don’t only need to evaluate myself. I need to evaluate Anonymous Agency, as a place to work.
Staff satisfaction survey:
1. Can you see yourself building a career here?
Well, that’s hard to say. I’ll be honest, it’s a little scary. I mean, I’m almost 30. My career should probably be building. Is it? At what point have I learned all that I can from this position? This was my first job out of graduate school. Will someone tell me when it’s time to leave the nest? Am I going to live in New York for the rest of my life? Will I have kids? Will I want to keep them if I have them? Is there someone in HR I can talk to about all of this? Was I just supposed to click “yes” or “no?”
2. Are you satisfied with your benefits?
Yes, I am. But if someone could actually make a dental appointment for me, I’d bump this up to very satisfied. I just can’t stop procrastinating! If they would spring for full sedation so I don’t feel the buzzy teeth cleaning, you guys would get a gold star.
3. Do you feel your salary is competitive with other similar agencies in the field?
Oh, you guys are good. Am I satisfied with my salary–fuck no. But is it competitive for social work? Sure is!
4. What is the best part of working here?
I have learned a lot from my great work experience and my amazing supervisor. There is opportunity for growth and this is a well run agency.
I get tons of blog fodder. I love working with people at all different stages of deveopment, and with families as a whole rather than just as individuals.
5. What is the worst part of working here?
New Director led a two and a half hour staff meeting last week, and the only thing I remember is the 45 minute debate over what order progress notes should go into the files. Chronological, or most recent note on top. This was the worst part of everything that has ever happened to me.
Well, the results are already in. But there’s always next year.